My mother will turn 80 this Sunday (July 18) and I don’t know that I’ve ever been more glad to see a birthday than this one.

You see, my mother had a stroke on June 1 and has been in rehab in South Carolina since then. She’s in a facility in Mauldin, S.C., right now and is making some progress. She can stand up again and is regaining use of her left arm. Her goal is to get well enough to go back home.

Mama has tried to prepare me for the inevitable. I know what the inevitable is and I know what it means. And, quite honestly, I have never wanted to talk about it. My father died when I was 22 and my youngest brother – whom I have written about in this column a number of times – died when I was 30.

When my oldest brother called me June 1 to tell me that Mama had had a stroke, it was like someone sucker punched me in the gut. All of the air went out of the room and my stomach became a huge swirling mass of goo – like it did when my mother called me to tell me Walter was in the hospital.

Walter’s death in 1994 affected me deeply and I still carry the scars. They are still palpable after all these years, so palpable that it sometimes feels like it just happened.

He was my best friend, you see. He was sick for 10 years with a kidney disease and although the shell of his body showed the ravages of dialysis and the medicines he was on, his spirit was unbreakable.

He went to college (Clemson University) while he was on dialysis and graduated with a degree in mechanical engineering. He worked full time while he was on dialysis. When he realized it would be better for him to live closer to home, he did just that: he got a job working at a foundry in my hometown and worked there until he died.

He bought a house the year he died. I used to spend hours and hours over there helping him do things, going to town with him, just hanging out. Most times he would give me $20 before I left, sometimes more. He bought me a TV the summer before he died when he found out I didn’t have one. He would sometimes buy me groceries or put gas in my car. I miss him to this day.

His death brought my mother and me closer. She lost a son. I lost my brother, my best friend and my hero.

But I wasn’t a very good sister the last few months of his life. I thought then that there were more important things going on in my life and I didn’t spend as much time with him.

The last time I talked to my brother, we had an argument. That was on a Friday afternoon. By the following Tuesday he was in the hospital in a coma and on a respirator. By Thursday, he was gone. The depth of that pain was something I had never experienced. Its effect was life-changing.

So, as my mother gets closer to 80, she tells me she is open to what the Lord has in store for her. If it means she reaches 80, so be it. If it means something else entirely, then so be it, too. She has told me on more than one occasion that she is ready. And I know she is.

And while that makes my gut hurt, it also gives me a great sense of comfort. I know that when the Lord is ready for her, she will be ready too. I might not be ready for it, but I know I’ll be OK.

I already have two angels looking after me. A third one certainly can’t hurt.

nnn

A few housekeeping items:

- Visitors to our Web site (www.randolphguide.com) have probably noticed that the overall design has changed. It looks a little snazzier and it’s easier to find your way around than the old site. We’re also using the site more like a daily newspaper uses theirs: When something comes across my desk that I think readers need to know, I’m getting it onto the Web site – even if it hasn’t been in our paper yet or if it comes in after the paper is out. It’s just our way of keeping you informed every day.

- We’re looking for photos for our 2011 Reflections On The Past calendar, which will be coming out in November. We’re really interested in photos that show what life was like in Randolph County years ago – places that no longer exist, people who were the movers and shakers, events that have been a part of the Randolph County community for years. They can be from anywhere in Randolph County and the older, the better. We also need recipes. Turn to page 2 to find out how to send us items for the calendar this year. But hurry: It’ll be time to send it off for printing before we know it.

- Regular readers of The Guide might have noticed that we’ve been publicizing a lot more weddings, anniversaries, engagements and the like lately. Some things in life should be free, you know?

- Speaking of free, The Guide has been an in-kind sponsor for a number of events in Randolph County. It’s a win-win: The group we’re helping saves money and we get the chance to be involved in the community. So it doesn’t make any sense to me that the folks in charge of the art tiles project for the Sunset Theatre capital campaign didn’t ask us if we would run a free ad to advertise the program. I guess they think the people who read our paper don’t fit the demographic they’re trying to reach. That’s too bad. I have always been a supporter of the arts. That’s almost as dumb as a hospital not advertising in a publication because it doesn’t reach their demographic. I didn’t realize sick people came demographically. Guess that’s why I’m in the newspaper business.

- We love folks who come by our office to visit – especially when they become regulars. Like the man who is our current mail carrier. On the days he works, he comes bouncing into our office and drops a little ray of sunshine in at 431 South Fayetteville St. I’m not sure how we ended up with such a friendly mail carrier, but we sure do appreciate him.



Well, that’s about it for another week. The year is half over (we’re at week 28 for those who are counting) which means that Christmas stuff will begin showing up in stores before long. There’s just something fundamentally wrong with that, don’t you think?



Patricia M. Edwards is the editor and publisher of The Randolph Guide. She can be reached at (336) 625-5576 or by e-mail at pedwards@randolphguide.com.